Intimidation is one form of abuse. Using the list of behaviors provided by TheHotline.org, check for any behaviors you’re experiencing in your relationship.
- My partner makes me feel afraid by using looks, actions, or gestures
- Smashes things
- Destroys my property
- Abuses pets
- Displays weapons
Sometimes abuse can look like name calling can making you feel inferior. Check for any behaviors your partner displays.
- My partner puts me down
- Makes me feel bad about myself
- Makes me think I’m crazy
- Plays mind games
Isolation is another form of abuse. Check for any behaviors your partner displays.
- My partner controls what I do, whom I see talk to, what I read, and where I go
- Limits any outside involvement
- Uses jealousy to justify actions
Using the children to get what they want is another way your partner can attempt to control you.
- My partner makes me feel guilty about the children
- Uses the children to relay messages
- Uses visitation to harass me
- Threatens to take the children away
MINIMIZING, DESTROYING, BLAMING
- My partner makes light of the abuse and doesn’t take my concerns seriously
- Says the abuse didn’t happen
- Shifts responsibility for abusive behavior
- Says I caused it
USING MALE PRIVILEGE
When your male partner treats you like you are worth less than him, this is abuse. He’s using male privilege to assert power over you.
- My partner treats me like a servant
- Makes all the big decisions
- Acts like the “master of the castle”
- Is the one to define men’s and women’s roles
Using finances against you or withholding them from you is another form of abuse.
- My partner prevents me from getting or keeping a job
- Makes me ask for money
- Gives me an allowance
- Takes my money
- Doesn’t let me know about or have access to family income
COERCION AND THREATS
- My partner makes and/or carries out threats to do something to hurt me
- Threatens to leave me, to commit suicide, or to report me to welfare
- Makes me drop charges
- Makes me do illegal things
If you are a victim of domestic abuse, Crime Victims United is here to assist and support you and your loved ones thru this difficult time. Our virtual clinic provides resources for those seeking help, outreach and support.